Time Tuner Gifts

Ted attempts to correct his slow running hourglass.

"They grow up so fast."

'As far as clock watching goes, you take the biscuit.'

'I'm a virtuoso on the middle pedal.'

'Why do I have to do this? -- Violins never solve anything!'

"As I mentioned next week in my talk on reversible time..."

'I'd say you're a little late...'

'And if it ain't baroque, don't fix it.'

Quick, what's the five-second rule in dog years?

"Good morning - your neighbours have asked me to come and tune your piano."

"My first novel is a prequel of a sequel, it's about time travel."

'SSHHH, PIANOS. TWO GRANDS AND A BABY. ONE HAS THE LID UP AND THE OTHER ONE IS BARING ITS KEYS. BETTER GET THE CELLO.'

New Belief Systems

'Oh, that's out piano tuna.'

Internal Clock

"Norm, the piano tuna is here!"

'Don't worry, the first 30 years working as a sound engineer are the hardest.'

Piano-Tuning Bar

Tune Up Shop.

'As I mentioned next week in my talk on reversible time...'

Piano tuning shop in desert - "Ok, so I'll do a bit more market research next time."

"Turn off the TV and go to bed - I'm your mother, and I approved this message."

Mechanic tinkering with engine of a car made of a human head

Straightening up.

The lame stuff you listen to (yes, you)

"Norm, the piano tuna is here!"

'Tuna's here John.'

Is TV Dumbing Down? PRESS ON SWITCH

'This has been the Five O'Clock Report -- we now switch you to the Six O'Clock Report....'

Predatory Pianos.

Piano tuner with an assistant.

Cuckoo Clock - Cat waiting for it's dinner!

It's 10pm...do you know where your homework is?

What's that fish doing up there? Didn't you tell me to send for a piano tuna?

'OK start her up!'