Timber Enthusiast Gifts

"Should we have lunch first?"

'... Of course it's expensive. It doesn't grow on trees you know!'

'Say it with Timber'

"Today, son, you are a man."

A mouse has cornered a lady on a chair and is cutting down one of the legs with an axe - 'Timber!'

"Redwood or oak?"

Lumberjack Christmases.

Woodcutter yells 'timber' as tree falls on him.

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

Kid with messed up project in Wood Shop, titled: 'Wouldn't Shop'

"Stop the drama. Take that wig off and wait 'till spring like everyone else."

Rocking horse

'This guy loves giving stump speeches. Ironically, they're all against deforestation.'

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

'I love cutting trees in perfect circles because it drives aerial photography interpreters crazy.'

It's estimated that millions of trees are planted by forgetful squirrels.

Do you have anything bigger?

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

"I brought cocoa."

The native sweet bay species will make a beautiful grove. They'll give you pleasure and increase your house value! Tree's tree nursery. Hmm

Whittling a forget-me-not moose for the one you adore...

D.I.Y

Stop and Birch

'Next, time, we'll meet at my place.'

"The homes in this area are beautiful."

Lumber Yard. Luxury Homes! Some Assembly Required.

'Hello, Acme Termite Control...?'

'It's only now that we've chopped down all of the trees that we can see the damage we've done'

'I Love the touch of your dry flakey skin!'

Tree Squirrel

Luthier

"How do you know it's my leaves clogging the shower drain?"

"My mum's favourite recipes are: birch with mayonnaise, oak with tomato sauce, hazel with Dijon mustard, beech with salt and pepper and pine with soy sauce..."

"The best laid plans of mice and men... differ materially in their objectives."

Every time I get a postcard from your brother, I regret that I carved him out of driftwood.