Ticker Traveler Gifts

An airplane has stock market tickers on it.

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

'What did one flea ask the other?' 'Shall we walk or take the dog?'

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

Courtyard of the Hotel de France, Montreuil.

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

Off to see the world

Vaccination Passport

Lenin, Anticipating His Arrival at Finland Station, Sees His Baggage Taken Off at Beloostrov.

'Calm down...it's probably just another mirage.'

A white collar cow.

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

'I'm not here looking for a job. I'm the temp who's replacing you when the boss fires you today.'

"I'm going crazy staring at the same four legs."

Hoxton map.

When travelling with her cat by plane, train, or bus, dawn always ensured no one would bother them.

'It's a great job, but the commuting is murder!'

"You've traveled all this way just to score some pot? Okay—How much do you want?"

Rail travel - the environmental alternative (that sometimes doesn't allow bikes)

"Brooklyn is the Manhattan of the other boroughs."

'Anything to declare?'

'And upon landing the pilot will give everyone in first class a hug.'

Miniature Trailer on Desert Island

A guy fills up his camel with H2O in the desert.

A person seeking truth walks on a treadmill.

Of course, Hal rented a car with economy gps.

'I never tire of watching Hippies go by: They're so colourful...'

Notice to travelers: 'Delayed' is the New 'on time'.

'Father maybe gone some time.'

'I told you you should have bought a sat nav...!'

Nativity Scene on the Underground