Thorn Whisperer T-Shirts

"I am going to prune the climbing rose."

Speed Dating for Turtles

Gardener

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

Florabation - '..mmm...It must be spring!'

The Worm Charmer

"Ed's tree hugging was out of control."

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'Now it fits.'

'Do worms feel pain? Of course not! As a matter of fact...'

'My goodness,Ralph,let him have it.It's only a measly old meal worm.'

"Get out of my face!"

Raining

Where Deviled Eggs come from

'F-E-E-D-T-H-E-D-O-G . . . Hey that's spooky! Why would your granddad say that?'

Man mourns the loss of his king after being checkmated.

"Really? That's the only game in this house?"

Alice Through the Looking Glass - The Garden of Live Flowers.

Florist. A vase for everything and everything in its vase.

Agricultural Psychology

'Superstock'

'I could eat you.'

"It says you need a CT scan and that the azaleas in the corner need to be watered twice daily."

Sorry, I only eat organic, fair-trade, shade-grown, biodynamic, raw dirt.

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

Woman keeping a chicken in her room for fresh eggs

"It's a destination wedding invitation. We have to cross the road."

The spirit in the wall would go on and ond, but Alvin never let it bother him.

'Let's see. One dozen red wigglers, two dozen nightcrawlers,three dozen crickets. Want flies with that?'

"Wheeeeeeeeeee!"

'Do I remember pre-decimal coinage?I remember pre-Tudor coinage!'

"Hold on. If we're free range, I don't think we should be crossing a toll road."

'So, how much to remove this ugly old tree? $1750. It's not THAT ugly.'

"I'll check and see if he's available."