Chicken Whisperer T-Shirts

"The body is eighty-two-per-cent broth."

'Say, did you know that we actually only use a very small portion of our brain?'

'...Cockle-doodle-doo! Not cockle-doodle-whatever.'

"Don't look down on me, Buster, my ancestors were dinosaurs...what were yours?"

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

Valerie thrived in an internet community that had no idea she was a chicken...

"So how do we know if they've got this helium virus?"

'I don't like the way he keeps calling me Anne Boleyn.'

Scientists have found proof that the mighty T-rex is related to the humble chicken.

Frank and I had such a wonderful evening alone. Thanks for watching our lil' angels on such short notice. I know th- Andrea... What are the kids still doing up?

'You've got to be more assertive. You can't just say 'Cock-a-doodle-maybe-do.'

"It's still at the concept stage."

'That'll be 10 bucks please.'

'Small, medium or large?'

"Be honest Walter...Is it me you really love or just the farm-fresh eggs every morning?"

"Grandma!?"

Happy Hens.

How the chicken crossed the road...

Tarot Cards for Chickens

"You're free-range when I say you're free-range."

Poultry Reading: 'Lo, Ye Sky, It Falls! Verily it does, watch ye out!'

Free range chicken

'Sorry, but we've just published a novel written by a chicken.'

Large Very Fresh Eggs

"I think I'm ovulating."

"What are all your chickens doing out here?"

Chickens

Intensive farming

The Sky is Fallin'....

"It's a destination wedding invitation. We have to cross the road."

Oil of U-Lay

"You may be free range but we've got great legs."

"I'm making your favorite dessert, dear … seven layer cake."

"Sometimes I get so bored with myself I can barely make it to 'doodle-do.'"

Chicken standing on a platform on a stage with three horns in front of it and wearing a top hat; a sign on the side of the platform reads "National Endowment for the Arts - Seal of Approval."