Corn Whisperer T-Shirts

A mutant, possibly evil, ear of corn.

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

The Worm Charmer

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'You learn how to make dough later. For now, you're on a knead-to-know basis.'

Where 'Pastor'-ized Milk Comes From...

'Do worms feel pain? Of course not! As a matter of fact...'

'My goodness,Ralph,let him have it.It's only a measly old meal worm.'

"Remember, you're only as old as your peel."

"They’re real."

'Superstock'

Where Deviled Eggs come from

Agricultural Psychology

'I could eat you.'

Pull the udder one

"We would like to be genetically modified to taste like Brussels sprouts."

We come in pieces!

'Let's see. One dozen red wigglers, two dozen nightcrawlers,three dozen crickets. Want flies with that?'

"It's a destination wedding invitation. We have to cross the road."

"I'm a monster."

"Hold on. If we're free range, I don't think we should be crossing a toll road."

"You're wondering why I've called you here."

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

Sorry, I only eat organic, fair-trade, shade-grown, biodynamic, raw dirt.

'Mama! Aliens.'

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

"Earthworms are good guys, and birds are good guys—that's just life, honey."

"Yeah, birds are bad, but fishermen are the worst: they first stab you with a hook, then drown you to finish you off. . ."

"I'm making your favorite dessert, dear … seven layer cake."

'Where are you going?'

'In this league, guys, it's all about winning. And we're like, what, 0 and 10? That's why coach got the ax.'

"One word from you when the wife gets home and you're next Sunday's roast!"

'The first day on the job was not going well for Al...'