The Breakfast Boss Gifts

"Sorry, we don't serve the Lumberjack's breakfast to accountants."

"'Well done' lulled him into complacency."

"Larry, what's the weather forecast?" "Let me ask you something. Did you make waffles this morning? Because someone had maple syrup on their hands, and I seem to recall a hand moving me... a pretty, pretty, pretty sticky hand..."

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

Licensed to grill.

WHACK!

Power breakfast.

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

It was then that Cervantes was inspired.

'Do you want toast with that?'

I bake my own bread.

"You're close, but you're not the record. The record for one family in one booth—all from out of state, each ordering a complete breakfast—was set in 1978, with fifteen."

'The early bird can have the worm as far as I'm concerned -- I'd rather sleep in and then go to McDonald's.'

'Mom! Instant oatmeal is NOT fast food!'

'Yeah. Yeah... Wolf, girl, grandma. I got the picture.'

'It's one of those trendy 'warm salads,' with sausage, fried eggs, bacon and black pudding.'

'You know what they say Mum: The early bird catches the worm! So I'm sleeping in...'

Sugar Crunchies - Free Dental Treatment.

"Nice landing, Captain Crunch."

'Here he comes in his jimjams - cutting it fine with out breakfast today!'

1% Cereal: Now with marshmallow dollar signs.

Devilled Eggs

"Are you ready for the working breakfast?"

Humble beginnings of the International House of Pancakes

'We're starting a new diet today -- do you want your tofu scrambled or fried?'

"You confused the Sudso box with the Cruncho box."

Chef Contest. Ernie, it's not sporting to chant "batter, batter, batter" during a pancake cook-off.

F&E Diner. You asked for a hot breakfast, so I put some jalapenos on your corn flakes!

'I don't need that exercise stuff -- I cross the pain threshold just getting out of bed in the morning.'

'Shredded wheat cereal, cracked wheat toast, and crushed pineapple. I didn't do it. It came that way.'

"Honey, the toaster is down, but it's already alerted the oven to pre-heat and broil your muffins."

Have you seen this toaster?

Wife at breakfast: 'We're out of sugar - how about chocolate milk on your cereal?'

It's the little surprises that keep a marriage exciting...

'Madge, did we really need a home computer to make scrambled eggs?'