The Breakfast Boss Pillows

"Sorry, we don't serve the Lumberjack's breakfast to accountants."

'Okay. Time to get up. 1... 2... 3... Go!' - 'Actually, maybe I'll just rest my eyes for a few seconds.' - 'Zzzzz...'

"Larry, what's the weather forecast?" "Let me ask you something. Did you make waffles this morning? Because someone had maple syrup on their hands, and I seem to recall a hand moving me... a pretty, pretty, pretty sticky hand..."

"'Well done' lulled him into complacency."

WHACK!

Power breakfast.

'Snap, crackle, help! I'm lactose intolerant!'

It was then that Cervantes was inspired.

I bake my own bread.

"You're close, but you're not the record. The record for one family in one booth—all from out of state, each ordering a complete breakfast—was set in 1978, with fifteen."

'The early bird can have the worm as far as I'm concerned -- I'd rather sleep in and then go to McDonald's.'

'Mom! Instant oatmeal is NOT fast food!'

'Do you want toast with that?'

'Yeah. Yeah... Wolf, girl, grandma. I got the picture.'

'It's one of those trendy 'warm salads,' with sausage, fried eggs, bacon and black pudding.'

'You know what they say Mum: The early bird catches the worm! So I'm sleeping in...'

Sugar Crunchies - Free Dental Treatment.

"Nice landing, Captain Crunch."

'Here he comes in his jimjams - cutting it fine with out breakfast today!'

Devilled Eggs

1% Cereal: Now with marshmallow dollar signs.

"Are you ready for the working breakfast?"

'We're starting a new diet today -- do you want your tofu scrambled or fried?'

"You confused the Sudso box with the Cruncho box."

'I don't need that exercise stuff -- I cross the pain threshold just getting out of bed in the morning.'

'Shredded wheat cereal, cracked wheat toast, and crushed pineapple. I didn't do it. It came that way.'

'Madge, did we really need a home computer to make scrambled eggs?'

It's the little surprises that keep a marriage exciting...

Parkour Breakfast

Have you seen this toaster?

'Hey, milk!'

Wife at breakfast: 'We're out of sugar - how about chocolate milk on your cereal?'