Territorial Sleeper Gifts

Sharing the bed - or not.

Sleepwalker on treadmill

A man cheers

Bed Seasons

I know time is an earthly construct, but I still feel sleepy in the afternoons.

Rip Van Winkle, "He's survived the operation, now he's sleeping peacefully."

Programmer Dreams

'Sure I sleep all day. She snores all night.'

"Before I prescribe a sleeping pill, I'd like you to try the opera."

"Not me, brother - you wake him!"

'Since we got this round bed, I've been waking up dizzy every morning!'

'OVERSLEPT? All four thousand of them???'

Waking the Dead.

A caveman sleeps with a club labelled 'Snooze' whilst a beaten looking rooster stands by.

Cat wakes up owner demanding to be fed.

"When I can't sleep I don't count sheep I count my blessings."

“I get that the sounds help you sleep, but I don’t like the way he stares.”

"This alarm clock is guaranteed to wake you. It's sounds like a husband snoring."

"Just two paragraphs from our internet provider's terms and conditions agreement and she was out like a light."

"Sorry - is my snoring driving you nuts?"

Sleepless Night with a Mosquito

Doug always circled around four or five times before lying down to sleep.

The Home Birth of Venus

'You're snoring in cadence.'

'I got rid of those funny little spots in front of my eyes. Now what's bugging me is a buzzing noise in my ears, like somebody sawing logs.'

'Get up or I'll send in gramma.'

"Could you stop making that breathing sound?"

'I'm going to get up, do the treadmill, walk the dog and leave for work early. What are going to do?'

"No! I don't think these are adjustable beds. Why?"

STRIP Hambone: Sleeping employee has sheep on his monitor

Man asleep on train

'I can't sleep a wink - it feels like someone's got their life savings under here.'

"It says, 'sorry ... I forgot you're three hours earlier out there'."

Of all the days to sleep in!

MLB Teams Capatalize on Longer Games Caused by Appeals.