Tennis Coach Gifts

'Your serves are great. Ground strokes, superb. It's your foot faults that are killing you.'

'What? You said court-appropriate attire!'

"Why do men play best of five and women best of three?"

'Advantage' (Tennis player has huge racket).

Tennis Court - "How do you plead?"

Tennis coach says to player, 'People are calling you the next Tim Henman!' Player responds with, 'Bastards!'

Tennis talking over the net.

Dog ball-boy.

'It's better to keep the second ball in your pocket.'

'Now, that's what I call a smash!'

Tennis Player Receives Unwanted Advice on the Tennis Court of Public Opinion.

'Your serves are a little weak. Practicing with this ball should solve that problem.'

'You're not supposed to jump over the net.'

'Wow, that's the worst case of tennis elbow I've seen this year!'

'Here's the problem, this wall is made out velcro.'

'That's my grunting coach.'

'It's not doubles. That's his agent back there.'

City Tennis Club

"His serve is excellent, his forehand is strong, his backhand and net game are coming along well, but he needs a louder grunt."

"Once more, with fury."

'Now keep your eye on the ball.'

Murray out of Wimbledon...

Tennis player lands on the net.

'Now remember,stay alert. This guy has a very powerful backhand' (a game of tennis about to start).

"Umm. . . Hello? I'm over here!"

Lawn Tennis

'Time!!'

"Have you considered the potential advantages of having a professional coach?"

Angry tennis player.

'My coach likes me to hit a few balls for her to warm up.'

COWS: Cow Pong

"Your serve is basically good, it's just you're doing something funny right at the very end."

"Anyone for tennis?"

"My pro said this would help my net game."

'No doubt about it... serves are MUCH faster these days!'