Chess Coaches Gifts

God giving simultaneous chess exhibition in Heaven

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

Bank Loan Dept. Personal Business. Uh-oh, some loans have gone bad! A tennis pro defaulted and a novelist is in Chapter 7. The bed linens company folded and the scuba school went under! Are any of our loans still good? Yeah, the music streaming service is totally sound! And ironically, the lighting company is in the black!

Cheers For The Hollyhock Middle School Chess Team

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

"College basketball recruiters are after him."

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

You can take the boy out of Wimbledon...

'And this is Allan...he's the brain in the family!'

Sweep the board.

Brad discovers what can happen when you don't wash your gym clothes...

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

'Let's go over our secret play.'

"You moved two spaced and then one space to the side? Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that sure sounds illegal."

'As meetings go that was one of my better ones!'

To attract a bigger audience, the world chess federation allow fans to distract an opponent when it's his move.

'Upgrades? Yes, we've programmed it to excrete a few drops of water if it should lose a chess match. You know - tears.'

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

"Damnit—Every game ends in stalemate."

Man mourns the loss of his king after being checkmated.

Target your message

COWS: Cow Pong

'I don't mind players entering the NBA at an early age. It's the diaper changes that I hate.'

'Some people just aren't cut out for adventure gaming, Bruno — maybe you should try chess or checkers.'

'I think they're up to something.'

'I don't think there's any hope for my golf game.'

Prawn Amend

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

Man and brain

'Checkmate I think!'

"Frankly, we’re concerned about your checkered past."

A gorilla plays chess with his keeper.

Peer-reviewed journal publication.

"Once more, with fury."

'Checkmate!'