Professional Chess Player Gifts

"Jump two squares forward and one to the side."

Cheers For The Hollyhock Middle School Chess Team

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

'This is Harris, he's been with the firm some 45 years!'

"You moved two spaced and then one space to the side? Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that sure sounds illegal."

'As meetings go that was one of my better ones!'

To attract a bigger audience, the world chess federation allow fans to distract an opponent when it's his move.

'Upgrades? Yes, we've programmed it to excrete a few drops of water if it should lose a chess match. You know - tears.'

'Some people just aren't cut out for adventure gaming, Bruno — maybe you should try chess or checkers.'

Man mourns the loss of his king after being checkmated.

Target your message

"Damnit—Every game ends in stalemate."

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"Frankly, we’re concerned about your checkered past."

Prawn Amend

A gorilla plays chess with his keeper.

Existential Risk

AIDS prevention

'I can not get this game, the pieces all move like cats.'

Man playing chess from his parked car.

Bored Baker

Chess on TV

Trojan Chess

'Do you want to be red Tory or blue Labour?'

'Some game dog you are. That's the fifth time in a row you've fallen for the King's Gambit.'

'It's true that money can't buy everything, Caldwell, but it's not healthy to dwell on it.'

'With your permission sir... checkmate.'

Kosovo.

"Once inside, the pawns will jump out and take them by surprise."

'I must have that painting for my office.'

Pawn Stars

"Gentleman, come in! Come in! Let me take your company."

'Maybe it's me, but I have a feeling we're being used as pawns.'

"Where do you see yourself in five moves?"