Chess Champion Wannabe Gifts

'Forgive the interruption, but can the surgeon wait until after he operates on me to play his chess.'

Melvyn Pawnmeyer: Cranial Dislocation. Out for the remainder of the season.

Cheers For The Hollyhock Middle School Chess Team

"Your son is asking a lot of questions about the giant hands in the sky that controls everything."

Sweep the board.

"You moved two spaced and then one space to the side? Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that sure sounds illegal."

To attract a bigger audience, the world chess federation allow fans to distract an opponent when it's his move.

'Upgrades? Yes, we've programmed it to excrete a few drops of water if it should lose a chess match. You know - tears.'

Man mourns the loss of his king after being checkmated.

'I think they're up to something.'

'Some people just aren't cut out for adventure gaming, Bruno — maybe you should try chess or checkers.'

Target your message

"Damnit—Every game ends in stalemate."

"Compare Calculate Contrast Before you make a move"

'Checkmate I think!'

Prawn Amend

A gorilla plays chess with his keeper.

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"Frankly, we’re concerned about your checkered past."

Peer-reviewed journal publication.

'Well, I'll say this: when the new boss came on board, it was a real game-changer for all of us!'

'Checkmate!'

'I can not get this game, the pieces all move like cats.'

"Game of checkers? Okay, but I'm watching every move you make."

AIDS prevention

Existential Risk

Man playing chess from his parked car.

Competitive tic-tac-toe

'Some game dog you are. That's the fifth time in a row you've fallen for the King's Gambit.'

Chess on TV

'It's not cheating...My king is Henry VIII.'

Bored Baker

'I must have that painting for my office.'

Kosovo.

Trojan Chess