Temple Of Wellness Explorer T-Shirts

'Are you sure your soul needs this much temple?'

Steamed Room: "Man, I feel so much lighter."

'You were right Doc: Jumping over the monn did boost my self esteem!'

Emoticon Encouragement Therapy

I applied for a job with NASA but they turned me down. I think it was because I told them I wanted to be an astronaut because in space, you can't cry because there's no gravity and tears can't flow.

"Looks like your Yang is on the move again."

Psychiatry. I got in touch with my inner child, and now I'm going broke buying video games!

'It took years of therapy before I became the Bluebird of Happiness.'

If all else falls...Mom's Chicken Soup

'Sometimes I think if it wasn't for Lucy here, I'd go mad.'

'I feel like such a failure: They have to process my milk to make it low-fat...'

'A mother complex! Are you sure?'

"How much is this going to cost me?"

'Look at the bright side -- having a business fail when you're thirty is great preparation for your Midlife Crisis.'

Man in a tortoise shell visiting a psychiatrist.

"Apparently you're a bi-polar bear."

"You have to remember you're not responsible for other people's happiness."

"I know it seems cruel, but it's the only way for him to get rid of that silly technophobia."

"Ever since the accident, I can't seem to get it together."

Tell me about the voices in your head, Al. On the one hand, they tell me to do horrible things. On the other hand, they sing the sweetest harmonies since the Mills Brothers.

How are you feeling, Al? I couldn't be happier, Dr. Kapuchnik. Gee, that's great. No, I mean I wanted to be happier, but I couldn't.

"Krazy straw"

'I'm going to refer you to Dr. Keinsorge -- he actually enjoys this sort of thing.'

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

"There's only so much bat-mansplaining a girl can take."

Odd Spas

"Apparently, I'm fun, but I'm no fun in bed."

"Too much caution can take all the fun out of life." "Mind if I get a second opinion?"

It's always the same dream. I'm in therapy, analyzing my recurring dream.

'The pain in my head always seems to subside when I flush your bills down the toilet!'

"No, not us. Do something every day that scares you."

'I suffer from depression too Ms Frost. Sometimes I'm not even motivated to get out of bed!'

Just one of the many ways self-help books can improve people's lives.

Sadie, we need to see a couple's counselor. Yuck. No way! I won't spend a bunch of dough to have some halfwit tell me how to live my life! But I found an inexpensive counselor who will just listen to us talk through our issues. Counseling $10. This end up.

"It's true. Your mother is a great oak, but she, too, used to be a little nut."