Temp Agency Worker Gifts

Contractor Ants

"I've given you a glowing reference, Hempson. And here's the disclaimer to go with it."

'Hello, is that the temp agency? Now listen, I specifically asked for Elves!'

'Sorry, Benson, but I automatically fire anyone who complains that I'm too autocratic.'

'Henderson! Find some DNA that matches mine and be quick about it!'

'Your hair looks fine.' Debbie's lack of concentration, meant that her work was beginning to suffer.

'I'm sure this is a lot less stressful than management.'

The temp agency decides not to send any more Samarai warriors to the programming department.

'Sorry, but I can't make ANY 'TEMPS' permanent..'

'I've got to change temp agencies.'

Underling supply agency

'I'm not here looking for a job. I'm the temp who's replacing you when the boss fires you today.'

'You're in luck - we do have a temporary position in advertising'.

"Would you like something you're under qualified for, or something you're overqualified for?"

"Because of illness, the role of Mimi in tonight's performance will be sung by a temp."

ROBOT EMPLOYMENT AGENCY, 'We don't have much on hand right now --how'd you like to be a Pez dispenser?'

Filling Cabinet - "Why are all the letters different?"

"I can always tell a permanent temp from a temporary temp."

Temp Employment Agency. Ah, I see that you have a short attention span.

When staffing agencies screw up.

"I'm from the Duvall Executive Search Agency, and I leave no stone unturned."

'Hello, is that the employment agency? It's about the domestic you sent me.'

A relevant sign for the shopkeeper's predicament.

"Can you perform under pressure?"

'We're looking for a 'temp' employee to serve time in Leavenworth.'

Unemployed man given role as the 'gluten fairy'.

"I only live for 24 hours, so I need a temp job that pays big bugs."

Corporate Advertising Agency: WEEKLY SCAM MEETING

'Now that they've got a new Pope, there aren't any openings for old guys.'

'I'm looking for something, like, 364 days a year.'

'Relax, you are in doggy heaven. I'm just from a temp service.'

"I'll be right back. If you need anything, just holler."

"Sorry, Thompson. No temps on the corporate huddle."

"Poor Chap,he's only been here a few days but the pressure of the job seems to have got to him already."

"A serf? We don't call you 'serfs' anymore. Nowadas we call you flexibly employed staff members!"