Teenager Jokes Pillows

'I don't care what your friends are doing. You're not leaving this house until your fix your label, young lady!'

Wordplay: Hibernation.

'There's so much I want to do with my life...before I reach the age of criminal responsibility, that is.'

"I failed my driving test...apparently I shouldn't have been texting!"

"So what's your definition of 'love'?"

'Boy squeezing a spot at boy squirting silly string'

'Now you behave yourself and don't throw and infestation while we're gone.'

"RUN! Here comes the long arm of the law!"

'To err is human. To really mess up, we've got to do some planning.'

'Well if sixty is the new fifty and forty is the new thirty then yes,twenty must be the new ten...'

'We all do a lot of stupid things when we're young. So, what'll take to remove that 'Butterball' tattoo?'

"Who made this mess?"

"Is there the slightest chance of credit being eased by this weekend?"

'Jeremy, you disgusting little pervert!'

'I need a haircut...maybe I should enlist.'

Our poor daughter doesn't have a prom date. Mo-om! I'm going with a group, of friends. No one "dates." Then I don't need a shotgun? Da-ad! I'll never get a boyfriend! Good. I heard that.

"These gas prices are crazy! By the time I'm old enough to drive...I'll only be able to date girls who live within a 1-gallon radius."

"When I first started school all I wanted were A's but since hitting puberty I'm far more interested in D's."

"It's so early in the year, and that English teacher…. She's already up in my grill."

I'm being cyberbullied. No way. Someone posted my face with a Justin Bieber haircut. Chillax, dude. The hot girls did it to half of the guys in our class. It's cyber flirting. Wow! Glad I wasn't left out.

"Baldo, get up! It's 1 o'clock in the afternoon! And take that auto window tint off your windows!"

"Typical teenager-straight for the burger bar."

So what if the school took a webcam picture of a kid at home? Emily? They're spying! It's totally over the line! What line?

Global Skate Boards...senior discount: 'High school SENIORS, Dude!'

'Life isn't fair. Just when girls get interesting, they get taller than us.'

'It must have been the fork in the road.'

'Washing dishes, why?'

'Until I was thirteen I thought my name was stop it!'

Poetry corner: junior high edition

'Truthfully, I love teaching middle-school kids, they're so interesting!...They're all just pudgy bundles of potential!...Although some of them smell funny.'

The kid who learnt about math on the street

"Ipod, playstation, trainers,clothes, why couldn't you get me something really useful like condoms?!

"My parents are okay too, I suppose. I just wish they weren't so...parenting!"

"I wasn't sure about veganism until I saw how much it inconvenienced my parents."

Introduce yourself to the new girl. Ok. I hope she doesn�t have some wacky, ethnic name. Be nice. Um�Hi! My name's Twig. Twig? What kind of wacky, ethnic name is that?