Teen Humor Pillows

The kid who learnt about math on the street

'These teenagers - when will they learn to lie around and do nothing all day?'

Wordplay: Hibernation.

"I failed my driving test...apparently I shouldn't have been texting!"

"And this is my oldest son I was telling you about. The one that eats like a horse."

"I'm training him."

'Boy squeezing a spot at boy squirting silly string'

'I get 23 stations and a place to hang my coat!'

'Now you behave yourself and don't throw and infestation while we're gone.'

"I'm kinda over all this snow. . . I'm ready for spring."

"Who made this mess?"

'Jeremy, you disgusting little pervert!'

Toy Grab/Toy Stab.

'I need a haircut...maybe I should enlist.'

"These gas prices are crazy! By the time I'm old enough to drive...I'll only be able to date girls who live within a 1-gallon radius."

"When I first started school all I wanted were A's but since hitting puberty I'm far more interested in D's."

"Is there the slightest chance of credit being eased by this weekend?"

'I don't care what your friends are doing. You're not leaving this house until your fix your label, young lady!'

"It's so early in the year, and that English teacher…. She's already up in my grill."

'Life isn't fair. Just when girls get interesting, they get taller than us.'

"Typical teenager-straight for the burger bar."

"Baldo, get up! It's 1 o'clock in the afternoon! And take that auto window tint off your windows!"

'Washing dishes, why?'

'Until I was thirteen I thought my name was stop it!'

'Truthfully, I love teaching middle-school kids, they're so interesting!...They're all just pudgy bundles of potential!...Although some of them smell funny.'

Poetry corner: junior high edition

"My parents are okay too, I suppose. I just wish they weren't so...parenting!"

"I'm only fourteen right now, but I figure by the time I get through this line I'll be old enough to drive."

"I wasn't sure about veganism until I saw how much it inconvenienced my parents."

No Radio on Board