Technophobe Humor Gifts

"I've got tech support. I'm on hold for tech support translator."

You, Sadie Cohen, need help using a computer. What of it, dork?! You, Queen of the Luddites, hater of new technology, angry critic of progress. Yes, you are a hypocrite. But do you realize what else you are? A geek. The most foul of the four-letter words.

'Dad's not getting the hang of the new technology, is he?'

"So what happens now? How do we start the Zoom video call?"

"Stop! You're painting over all my passwords."

Grandma's caf

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

High speed cinder block

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

"GPS? In my day, a newcomer learned to find his cubicle by memory."

Colonial Larrysburg.

'We never had all these labour-saving devices in my young day!'

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

Bill was so determined to Twitter no one dared tell him he couldn't do it with a calculator.

"Tarzan no want computer."

'You know, it's kind of nice turning off the sound, turning on closed caption, and listening to piano music.'

Members of the Luddite community carving computers from solid blocks of oak and maple

PC literate? Are you kidding- I can bearly use a shovel.'

'My backup special...'

EEEEEEEEEEEE-Mail

'Miss Wayson, find out who put this computer on my desk and tell them to get it the hell out of here!'

'Your physician has to have more confidence in e-prescribing. He followed up with a fax, an e-mail, and a phone call.'

'No mom, that's not spyware.'

"Why would I upload my files to a computer?"

"What's wrong with the computer you've got?"

"Can you give me your Christmas list on a regular sheet of paper? I don't know how to open the word document you emailed me."

'The main thing I like about this place is the complete absence of technology.'

"I'm meeting with Thor for drinks. He doesn't zoom.

'The Comedy of Computer Errors.'

"Some people are reluctant to accept change."

'Looks good on paper. Let's scan it in and see how it looks on the screen.'

"You're a great plummer, but those skills won't help you with fixing you computer. So put the plunger away and call a professional."

"I think it's time my grandpa upgraded his keyboard."

"No cell phone, no e-mails... boy, I've never felt so free1"

'I don't have e-mail or fax, not even a computer...if you haven't already guessed, I'm still living in the typewriter age.'