Technology Juggler T-Shirts

"I'll call you back. I'm in the middle of a make-over."

"For your enjoyment: Please turn off electronic devices, close your eyes, and cover your ears."

'I would've been ready earlier but after replying to email, checking cell phone messages, and adding Myspace friends, I forgot who you were.'

'It's great to get back to the simple life,'

In/Out/These Things Happen.

"Well the good news is that after the reorganisation you'll be leading the team."

"I appreciate your devices that make it seem like you're paying attention, but could you actually pay attention and make eye contact so I know you are?"

My phone is synced with my tablet, my tablet is synced with my laptop ... but none of them are synced with me."

There now, that wasn't too difficult was it!

'We need a product line that will stimulate our profit line.'

In Tray, Out Tray, and Shredded Paper Tray

"Sorry for the wait, our computers are down. We have to do everything manually."

'I need a text-mail interpreter.'

"Hello?"

"I don't think I can be truly happy unless I have more passwords."

We don't want statistics that reflect the actual market situation. We want statistics that reflect what was decided in this boardroom!

"I was just ringing to see if you got the e-mail about the letter I sent you?"

A single man has the job title of CEO, Business Manager, HR, Undermanager, Head of Division, Personnel. . .

'He pats my back, but I don't pat his.'

... and I'd suggest you take more frequent breaks from your computer.

"It just doesn't seem right. Ever since the new system upgrade nothing is where it used to be!"

One Man Band

'It's for you.'

'I've gone from spanning the globe at lightening speed to struggling with some techie's accent over a bad connection.'

"Judging by all the hair you've pulled out of your head, I must be hard to teach technology to than I thought."

'Will this job requirer me to look up from my phone?'

Trapeze artists.

"My eyes ache, that's enough zoom meetings and screentime for today."

'I can't make coffee, but I can keyboard, file, take shorthand and answer the phones like a champ!'

I hate blind carbon copies when the computers are down.

"I have a real love/hate relationship with email."

"Our smart home is blowing up my text. The oven is mad at the dishwasher. The dishwasher is mad at the lights. The lights are mad at the TV. And I thought out kids fought a lot."

"Are you O.K.? You're barely paying attention to your book, phone, show, laptop, and the crossword you started ten minutes ago."

"Everyone off the internet, I have a meeting to attend."

"I just can't seem to turn the Wi-Fi off."