Technology Guru Gifts

Museum. Thomas Edison Exhibit. Edison said genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration. I'm surprised he didn't invent the air conditioner!

It's just a dream. Tonight, a special report. I'm asleep. We explore the fragile psyche of Rudy Park. Wake up, Rudy. What turned this ordinary guy into a materialistic, iPhone obsessed lunatic? iPhone? Sponsored by Apple.

"I was trying to send a text message, but I think I bombed a terrorist camp with a remote control drone."

'And this is from our new line of self-driving, self-deprecating cars. It has a perfect driving record and it won't brag about it.'

'Of course I'm hurt. You didn't answer my text!'

'Well, he's back from tech support.'

'I guess this marks the beginning of the prin-ting dynasty!'

"Since we have spell check, what's the point?"

Caring for the phone

Pounding speeds up the computer.

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

Robot Parts $5

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

The Computer Bore

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

'I've decided to centralize my operations. Everything will be in my ipad.'

"Technology isn't making me smarter. It's allowing me to be dumb, faster."

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

"Google car."

"Sorry, we've found an app that's better at being you than you!"

"The GPS works great, we have satellite TV installed, the Sirius stereo sounds fantastic and our every move is tracked by Qualcomm. But could you turn around? I left me iphone at the house. . ."

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"Now that's what I call customer service!"

CEO with SEO

"Any questions?"

'Here's MY information highway!'

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

"I just love the way you're so endlessly inventive in the bedroom."

Evolution.

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

Computer Science Class 10101010101.

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'