Techie With Humor Gifts

"Do I put google maps on driving or walking directions?"

WIFI connections

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

Screen Time vs Book Time

"Sorry, website closed for lunch."

Fenton G. Gonklemeyer, Computer Scientist - Booted Up 1928 and Crashed 2009.

'What do you mean, I just flunked the Turing test?'

"Of course we'll give you a choice. Would you prefer to lose your job to outsourcing or to robotic automation?"

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

It's Your Turn to Do the Dishes Tonight!

GO AHEAD ... MAKE MY DAY!

Backlash industries: makers of the macro-chip, bigger, slower..and it even makes mistakes

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

'Masonry robot, what are you doing?'

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

Chef copy robot

"Basically it makes the same mistakes we've always made - but it makes tham so much faster!"

'Maybe a firewall isn't enough to protect our computer from worms and viruses. That's why I additionally installed this fence!'

"Oh, sorry, I wasn't flirting with you – I was checking my phone."

'Now where's my Tibbles got to?'

"Siri meets Alexa" "What can I help you with?" "I'm sorry, I can't answer that."

"Have a seat with the other candidates for the tech position but be wary of the spit balls."

'Honey, tell me honestly...does this operating system make me look big-endian?'

"Hackers, Sire! They've broken through our firewall."

HUAWEI 5G

Oog is backing up all our files.

"I gave up on the wheel and designed this. You'll thank me when electricity is invented."

"Lost drone! Reward! Goes by the name of 'Phantom 3'."

'I store all my data in the cloud.'

'The problem seems to be in the memory bank.'

'It's a snow mobile.'

"... And in the event of a sudden change in cabin pressure, please tweet with the hashtag #FeelinTheBreeze."

"We've run all the technical stuff and found the cause of the funny sound coming from your computer."