Techie With Faith Gifts

Why god isn't listening...

"In the same of the phone, the tablet, and the desktop computer."

God's Phone

'Throw in your iPad and you've got a deal.'

"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."

'Take this stick-drive and open the file 'John's Emotional Baggage'. It'll save a lot of time.'

Man sitting at computer. Home sweet homepage framed on wall.'

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

Follow God On Twitter

'For your penance, download five 'Hail marys' and ten 'Our fathers'.'

"Virtual Reality glasses. Well, I said my sermon would let them see the real difference between Heaven and Hell this morning"

'To everything there is a season; a time to cut, and a time to paste...'

Boy at Computer.

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

'Today's sermon may seem a little incoherent -- my 'Preach-o-Mat' program crashed.'

"To create the universe, hit the space bar."

"The pacemaker implant was fine. But you need to remember the password."

"I'm having trouble in computer class, Sir. Please send tech support."

"Let me see if I can get Him on speakerphone."

"We're cyber criminals, Barnes, NOT common criminals. Go get cleaned up and look like you're tech-savvy."

"I have sent you all an e-mail of today's text if you wish to follow along."

'For more details or to comment, please visit my faithbook page.'

"Sorry, but the Wi-Fi password is for tithing church members only."

'I back up my files religiously. I pray nothing happens to them.'

"The good news is a major company has noticed our website. The bad news is they're accusing us of copyright infringement."

Orchestra playing to working man.

'Well, he's back from tech support.'

Jesus Saves

'It will be nice to have the words of my sermon there but it could be distracting to run football scores ... '

"Of course we have unlimited data..."

'Does 'Amen' mean 'Send'?'

"Let us bow our heads, turn off our cell phones, and pray."

"Baldo, you spend too much time on that thing. Why don't you get yourself outside for some fresh air?"

'Click on the icon.'

'He googles you. That's how God knows everything about you.'