Tech Devout Gifts

"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."

"Textin’"

God's Phone

"Are our prayers answered whether we have an iphone or an android?"

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

"Virtual Reality glasses. Well, I said my sermon would let them see the real difference between Heaven and Hell this morning"

Priest's computer screen reads: 'e-confession. Please type 10 Hail Marys ... and no cut'n'paste ...'

". . . and don't forget to like and subscribe to my channel. Amen."

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

'Today's sermon may seem a little incoherent -- my 'Preach-o-Mat' program crashed.'

'For more details or to comment, please visit my faithbook page.'

"Let me see if I can get Him on speakerphone."

"I'm having trouble in computer class, Sir. Please send tech support."

Why god isn't listening...

Church Sign Asks If You Are Prepared for Digital Conversion.

'I back up my files religiously. I pray nothing happens to them.'

Jesus Saves

"Of course we have unlimited data..."

"Hi, Mum, I'm last in the race, but I do have the best mobile."

'Well, he's back from tech support.'

Couple are so focused on their cellphones they don't notice their house burning down around them.

'Does 'Amen' mean 'Send'?'

'...and to speed up the collection process, donations can now be made by texting 'CHURCH' to 873346.'

'Number 1 on my fave 5 is Dial-A-Prayer.'

Guru Needs Tech Support

Church window shaped computer monitor.,

"Let us bow our heads, turn off our cell phones, and pray."

'Click on the icon.'

'New Religion'

"Could I get it as an ebook?"

"And do please remember to visit our online confession service."

"This model is great. It monitors my heart rate, vitals and counts my blessings."

'Please enter your sin, followed by the pound sign.'

'All the rest can scroll to Leviticus on your Bible software...'