Tech Devotee Gifts

"Textin’"

Priest prays to phone.

Couple are so focused on their cellphones they don't notice their house burning down around them.

"Hi, Mum, I'm last in the race, but I do have the best mobile."

'New Religion'

Woman checks her phone while being operated on.

"Jeffrey, quit playing with your smartphone & go outside to play! Make some friends!"

"Are our prayers answered whether we have an iphone or an android?"

"I asked my mom for a new iPhone, and she said she would 'get right on it.' Luckily, I have an app that alerts me of sarcasm."

"I'll have to run some tests on your irritated eyes, but just how much time do you spend staring at electronic devices?"

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

In the Guru District

"It's almost 5 o'clock! Where the hell is my vodka app?!"

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

'I've decided to centralize my operations. Everything will be in my ipad.'

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

Claus 2.0

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

"He might not have got the job with Google, but they weren't going to stop Brian skateboarding to the office."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

Computer Science Class 10101010101.

'Who changed the password to 'arf'?'

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

The Little Search Engine Who Could: 'I think I can...I think I can...'