Techie Granddad Vibes Pillows

"Who's the old guy trying to be hip?"

The cell phone soother for life.

"Right here is your baby’s infrastructure, and in a month or so we’ll be able to see the analytics."

Father

'F-E-E-D-T-H-E-D-O-G . . . Hey that's spooky! Why would your granddad say that?'

'We're beta testing Goo-Goo Glass.'

"The Internet ate my baby!"

'I'm a work-at-home dad.'

"Go ask your search engine."

'The idea is to go where no man my age has gone before. I want to be the 'John Glenn' of Salsa.'

"You're getting more wrinklier, grandpa. You should drink more water."

'Have you been giving them too many tweets again?'

Drone Baby Delivery

"So totally gross, yet, so totally cool Dad!"

Baby eating "Uploading", Baby on toilet "Downloading"

Little boy feeds fish away from fisherman.

Bubbies and technology

"The kids? They're great! Karen got retweeted by a famous YouTuber and Timmy just hit 16K Insta followers. They start influencing so quickly, don't they?"

"Your Covid-19 Test Results Are In..."

"Not now, honey. Daddy's arguing with strangers about the sexual orientation of puppets."

'Thanks, kids. . . it's just what Grandpa wanted. . . the new remastered Rolling Stones retrospective.'

Happy Eightieth Birthday

'I need some tech support here!'

"Old soldiers don't die...they just get medal fatigue."

"It's just like that thing you've got under your bed, only this one is for old people."

'Oh, yeah? Wanna bet my Dad has more passwords than your Dad?'

"Show some respect, stop saying 'Who isn't a pretty boy.'"

I'm going to have a baby girl soon. What's a good name for a baby girl, Randy? Wait … you're going to have a what? Tell me you didn't just say what I think you said, little buddy. I'm going to have a baby girl. Met a lady, we fell in love, got married, and now we're going to have a baby girl. Wait ... you're talking about some video game, aren't you? I'm thinking of naming her SIMantha, but that might bee too obvious.

"I'm working on texting my memoirs."

"Gran'dad, when you was in the war was it before or after the whole world went mad?"

"I'll plug you in, tell you a bedtime algorithm, then LEDs out."

'He likes to rest before he gets tired.'

'Grandad, tell me about when you were a yuppie.'

'Grandpa call it easy listening, but it's not.'

"Don't pay attention to my granddad. He's an old pilot and always calls us 'taildraggers.'"