Tech Repair Gifts

"O.K., God – please delete everything I said today."

The Office Dinosaur in: Mr. Fix-it

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

"In the old days, we had to constantly feed the screensaver."

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

"The article you sent me on how technology causes stress crashed my computer."

'Calling Tech Support does NOT count as one of my wishes!'

'A computer is only as good as the people who are employed to replace the people who were made redundant by the computer.'

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

Gadget geek.

A DIY disaster.

"Don’t you eyeball me, Ed! That’s right, look down at the table. Only technicians who remember to back up the data can look at me! And if you start to cry I will fire you!"

"Yes, we do accept resumes online, but there's more to it than giving me your computer with your resume on it."

Terry had a computer bug.

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

"Has the Wi-Fi seemed slow to you lately?"

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

"It's just temporary, until I fix the air conditioner."

Lady about flat tire: 'It's not too bad - it's only flat on the bottom.'

Card Reader in PC Supplies Store.

It's all fixed. Just don't type anything that contains the letter ‘E'.

'Fixed the leg on the telly yet?'

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"

"Tommy? Hi, this is daddy. How's my big boy? Sweetie, daddy needs your help."

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

"To retrieve password: Please answer your secret question, which is, 'what is your password?' hahahaha!"