Teasing Buddy Gifts

"Will you stop saying 'I thought you liked a bit of rough...!!'"

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

Peach flirting with a banana.

"I think it stopped breathing."

"Honestly, Paula, I don't know what I'd do without our daily keggers."

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

"You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!"

"We tried to play nicely, but frankly it's not as much fun as tormenting each other."

'Ted, isn't it about time you sorted out your deer-gut?'

'I was in the right place at the right time once, and then I realized it wasn't ME.'

'No, you don't have hemorrhoids. You have a case of himorrhoids, has your husband been a pain in the butt, lately?'

"'Ere, mate - you look like a right muppett..!"

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

'You say the pains in my left leg are caused by old age. But doctor my right leg is just as old and it doesn't hurt at all!'

"Very funny."

'It was a gift.'

'I don't know much about Art, but i can tell you all about his wife.'

"Oh my, you're a dirty little weasel, aren't you darling?!"

"When's the last time you shaved, little buddy?"

Banana striptease...

Hit Me

I thought we'd get fake tattoos of each other's names. If we're still together in 10 years, we'll get real ones.'

Look out, you're sitting on a worm!

I used my first draft pick on the turkey leg. It's a proven point-getter! I drafted potatoes. They're not flashy but they are a reliable performer! I'll trade my cranberry sauce for you pie. It's a win-win trade that will benefit us both! No trades -- This pie will score a lot of points for me later! Why are they talking about this wonderful meal like it's fantasy football? It's not a game with winners and losers here. You're absolutely right! Just being here together sharing this meal,

"When life gives me lemons, I know twenty-six ways to kill a man with a lemon."

'Did you spill my pint?'

Getting together to chew the fat.

'I don't like the look of yours...'

'Blah, blah, blah....'

'Hey Goldie, the house is on fire!' 'Wow, I just found out the world is round!' 'I hear they're gonna make gloves out of you.'

'Do you know the Lincolnshire poacher?'

"You know all the best pubs for lunch, Seamus."

'Dad... He's still making faces at me!'