Teasing Enthusiast Gifts

Your brother's just teasing you, dear - I'm sure he didn't lick every one of them.

Working class couple walking past a dentist

'Hey Goldie, the house is on fire!' 'Wow, I just found out the world is round!' 'I hear they're gonna make gloves out of you.'

'My client was goaded into committing the crime, Your Honor -- he pleads not guilty by reason of teasin'.'

'I wish you would stop calling my birthday a historical re-enactment!'

"Did we switch everything off before we left?"

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

'Sexy...I love what you're doing with your ears.'

"We tried to play nicely, but frankly it's not as much fun as tormenting each other."

Tartar sauce.

Love and temptation go hand in hand...

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

"Very funny."

'Hey Dave, check out the kinky underwear this chick is taking on her trip!'

"Oh my, you're a dirty little weasel, aren't you darling?!"

Banana striptease...

Hit Me

'I'm writing a phone book...Can I have your number, please?'

'But enough about me... let's talk about you. Do you prefer plain or ribbed condoms?'

'I don't like the look of yours...'

"If I had a million dollars, I'd buy myself a new car, a new house for Dad and new clothes for Tia Carmen!"

"Don't worry, and don't listen to your brother! You can't really smell fear: it's just an expression..."

"I'm wearing new cologne. I hope Smiley is able to control herself around me today."

"May I eat at the bar ... read your paper, text friends and hit on you?"

Really tall guy with a 'Kick Me' sign attached.

"Well, hellooo gorgeous! Did you hear the humans named a position after us?"

'My dad says I'm good at training little animals - Sit, boy!'

'My wife can never resist dessert'

'Your intoxication beauty has made me forget my problems, my inhibitions, my wallet. Would you mind paying for the check?'

"Dude...Smiley wants to meet me for a burger...maybe it means she's hungry."

"Gracie, no matter how smart-pants you are...I still love you."

"That's not what I meant when I asked you to put him down. Now you've gone and hurt his feelings."

Bring it on, Scrabble nerd! Want to tell him directly? What do you mean? There's a chat function so you can taunt other online Scrabble players. Just type in your insult and hit send. Have I died and gone to heaven? The internet. And I suspect it's met its match.

Teddy Tree is trying out for lacrosse. LOL! No way! That spazoid nerd? Hey! No one disses my little brother! Ok. Ok! Sorry! That's my job.