Teaching Career Aspirant Gifts

'We are looking for highly motivated, confident decisions makers for headships. Is your son such a man, Mrs Smikins?'

A Puppet Named Juan

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

How to deliver a successful presentation.

'What begins with 'E'? Well, 'Everything'!'

'OOO, I've thought of a new one! Two squiggles and a backwards G!'

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

Staff Yearbook

'Kiddie school is teaching about sharing; and someone shared their cold with Jennie,'

"Today in class we're going to create a physics teacher."

'To them, capital punishment means making them use proper capitalization.'

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

"Hey, you guys, don't you remember? The big word here is 'compromise.' "

'Well, when you mess up on the job, you know where you stand with me.'

'The trouble with education is everyone knows how to teach, but nobody knows how to learn.'

'New career low - gave out a page of Ulysses to my freshmen and they thought it was a wordsearch.'

"I've got the ninth grade chemistry class this term."

"Memorizing the multiplication table is NOT brainwashing!"

'Is that enough peace on earth, Miss? I've got my tuba lesson in ten minutes and kickboxing at six...'

"Remember double negatives are a complete no-no."

"The STEM program has many advantages: you can invent stuff, you can use great equipment...but let's talk about the great cafeteria food."

"Must be the new philosophy teacher."

Emily knew she wanted to be a veterinarian before she was two years old.

"When I grow up I'd like to model for a pasta company."

Smirking or Non-smirking

'I give the same advice to all new teachers. Pretend you know what you are doing.'

"I think I'm making progress. One of them asked a follow-up question today."

The Ideal Teacher.

"I circulate around the classroom to make sure the class runs smoothly. I need a pair of comfortable walking shoes."

"That's the problem today. Everyone expects the same old standardized answers."

'Could I see you after class?'