Teacher's First Job Gifts

Teacher appreciation then...and teacher appreciation now.

A Puppet Named Juan

'No Renee, not until you get two degrees, pass a rigorous physical, and beat out thousands of other qualified individuals.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

"But everyone is befuddled by math."

'I guess there are lots of rotten jobs, Gramma...I hope I don't have to clean the taco hut forever.'

Pajama Day 743

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

'I've already been recruited by one of the top fast-food chains in the country!'

How to deliver a successful presentation.

'What begins with 'E'? Well, 'Everything'!'

"I can't get used to being a grownup."

A very young man being hired as a groom.

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

"Happy Anniversary, dear! It's a gold spray-painted macaroni necklace."

'And I see you've listed opposable thumbs as your greatest asset...'

'I don't know what he does, but I'm afraid to ask.'

'OOO, I've thought of a new one! Two squiggles and a backwards G!'

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

The Paper Route

'I took a couple of years off after college to work on my smirk.'

"I see here that you are a recent graduate."

Staff Yearbook

'Kiddie school is teaching about sharing; and someone shared their cold with Jennie,'

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

Responsibility and duties

"Today in class we're going to create a physics teacher."

"Here's a manual of our rules and a CD that covers our unwritten rules.

'To them, capital punishment means making them use proper capitalization.'

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

'We offer full benefits. A desk, a chair and your very own cubicle.'

'We're looking for someone who is willing to just do their job.'