Teacher Humor Enthusiast Gifts

"Just teachers' lounge will suffice, Al."

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

"Should we put down what we think is right, or what we think you think is right?"

'You could always say the dog ate your lesson plan.'

'You're flunking me? -- What about the statute of limitations?'

"I think the teacher who says that I got into trouble today is part of the fake news conspiracy."

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

'My teacher is a man of letters...except A and B.'

'Will Mr. 'No Comment' please remain after class.'

'I don't think much to faith school dinners.'

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

Empty Headed Schoolboy

'Child labor laws don't apply to homework, Jimmy.'

'The dog won't eat my homework.'

"No, you can't ask Alexa a quick question. This is a test, so you're on your own."

'Why, yes, I think that's a lovely sweater, Peter... But you know the rule: no snacks unless you brought enough for the whole class.'

"I'm subcontracting math, spelling and geography to my smart phone."

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

Teacher's pet dog

"I've got the ninth grade chemistry class this term."

Do Not Pass. Just like high school.

Party Schools...

K-9 Garten

"You were sent to the principal again for horsing around? That's so unfair!"

"And then after high school, I spent twelve years in college and majored in procrastination."

"It's a clear case of RLS: Repetitive Lecture Syndrome."

'My principal wants to see you about my principles.'

'It has cut down on note-passing, glancing at fellow students' test papers and spitballs.'

'Your homework got washed away with your house! A likely story young man! See me after class!'

'Sorry I'm late -- the Principal held me for questioning.'

'I know it hasn't any wheels...They're still in the pencil.

'How do you like school?'