Tavern Tales Fan Gifts

"You look good for your age."

The Stumble Inn Bar & Grill

". . . so a duck walks into a . . ."

Pat's Bar, Rotgut Tasting 5-7.

'Take Gerald a cup of punch or something, I think he's feeling left out.'

Jolly Sailor - Warning: May contain old salts.

'The Moving Finger Writes; And, Having Writ, Moves On To A Three Week, Twenty City Book Tour.'

'You've had enough!'

Circus trousers

"Wouldn't it be cool to live in the middle ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords?"

'Another triple, Joe -I'm trying to forget several women.'

'Yes, the owners are giraffes...Did I forget to mention it?...'

"You must be the new barmaid."

'Brian hated his long legs and dinner parties'

Hugh - From Barnaby Rudge

"Go on, Van Helsing, make my night!"

Shanahan's

'You just grew three inches.'

Tavern: Perfect Attendance.

Child In A Bar.

Al's Bar, All You Can Drink $375.

'I used to do a lot of business over the phone, but as soon as Caller ID came along...'

Man leaving the tavern and realising he is late for dinner

'Old McAllister is a real crank -- he has a conspiracy theory about Tom Bodett.'

"I have a female landlubber in every port."

'Oh, one of those tough guys with a mustache, eh?'

'How many experience points do I have? — I'm not that kind of girl!'

Joe's Bar, not for Sissies. Sissies, try Bruce's bar around the corner.

God sees his doppelganger in the toiletries aisle.

'When I asked to go somewhere nice and warm, I didn't mean inside your trendy jumper.'