System Administrator Gifts

'You're pretty new to cloud storage aren't you?'

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

'Ok, give me your username & password one more time.'

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

"Well the good news is that the system is completely secure,no one can get into it...and the bad news...It's because it's crashed!"

Bob soon began to hate his new anti-spam software.

STRIP Hambone: "System been down long?"

'This biometric ID badge is part of the new security system. The badge contains my encoded retinal scan, fingerprints, and level of job enthusiasm.'

After the upgrade, crashes were far less frequent and seldom fatal.

'The boss said to get rid of all the pirated software before he returns, which will be in about five to ten years.'

'The staff are healthy enough, it's the computers that keep getting a virus!'

"The system's down."

'Is this the new input device?'

'With the company's move to virtualization, the network hardware became obsolete. They let us keep it for the break room and they sold the furniture online.'

'Here comes the 64-bit local bus.'

'Ever since they installed the SPAM filter, I haven't had a single letter.'

'Spyware...what on earth is that?'

Monitor Reads: Now You've Done It! AAIIIIEEE...

"And with the optional remote you make all these little lights go off and on really quickly." You can have an IT system with all the latest bells and whistles...or you could have one that WORKS

'Try rebooting.'

"Don't force it. Let me call tech support."

I see the computer system is down again.

'I can't be fired - I'm the only one who knows all the company's computer passwords.'

'Right...The new system is up and running...I want every one of you to attach a lucky rabbit paw to their workstation.'

'That book is still floating around the system.'

"Thank you for computerising the company - you are now obsolete, Goodbye."

"I see your problem"

Internal Server error: Your server was unable to fulfill your dream request.

"The employees from the two companies are adapting very well to the merger. I wish I could say the same about the computer systems!"

"Yes, we know the system is down. Our technical people are working on it right now."

'Have you tried switching it off and on?'

Where was I?

"I don't know what this mumble jumble I just said means either. Let's call tech support."

'If the Mayan calendar is right, how should I back up my files?'

You're so demanding, run it yourself!