Sword And Shield Collector Pillows

'The battle for hearts and minds was proving too difficult, so I thought we'd just make do with heads.'

"These aren’t the droids you’re looking for."

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

Lady of the bath...

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

How Swordfish Are Born

'Next Please...' (Joe's Sharpening Service).

"It's time I got a bigger sword!"

In/Out

'Damn, I knew that disabled access would be our undoing.'

'He'll stop being so smug when he gets his first dent.'

A barbarian warrior eats his breakfast

Knights queue up to attempt to pull excalibur with a claw machine.

'You can scratch your back when the war is over!'

Soldiers' Ego

Sabrage!

"Does it hurt when I do this?"

Weapons of War Through the Ages.

'None shall pass!'

'Do you ever get this weird, primitive yearning to sit behind a large block of wood?'

'That's Renfrew -- he's in charge of high-risk portfolios.'

Knight walking his pet armadillo.

"Now now, what have I told you about using your zombie knife at the dinner table..."

Knight school.

Watering can helmet.

'That's the new budget team that came on board last week!'

'Look out, it's a double edged sword. . .'