Swing Improver Gifts

'Y'know what? Maybe we should eliminate your backswing altogether.'

"Looks like we found the issue."

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

he tries to fly all the time but actually never gets airborne

Tool Box

"Well, he promised you the moon and stars."

Conservation Area

'Ray's as excited as...well...as excited as a guy who just bought a snowblower on the eve of a storm.'

'What kind of alteration did you have in mind?'

'Lost your ball again?' - 'No, I've got my ball. I've lost my club.'

"Has anyone else noticed that the efficiency experts seem a little robotic?"

"You really need to think about getting glasses."

Golfer hanging from tree branch to play difficult shot.

'...you said, 'it only gets a bit damp when it rains'!''

Doctors Discussion

'Well, that's fixed that.'

'I'm sure I could lie on my back waving my feet in the air if I could play the saxophone.'

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

The Day Dreamer.

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

'Do you have any golf balls that are not attracted to water, sand or trees?'

'Don't you think it's time you did something about the draught in here?'

Mother pushes twins on a double-decker swing.

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

"Maybe you need some kind of app to make it work."

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

'Please excuse the mess. The interior decorators are in.'

"So is that a slice of a hook? I never know which is which."

"Oh no! This chimney needs re-pointing."

"Our smart home sure is sensitive. Every time I hammer a nail in the wall it screams."

Man's best friend

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

"When you get a minute, I have some kitchen shelves you can put up."

'Any day now I'll fix the roof.'