Swing Specialist Gifts

At the golf detox clinic.

Where golfers come from.

'Your direction is good! Now try for distance.'

I've had a fantastic round, I've even got a ball left over!

Chris felt that, with diligence, he could teach Jack to hit a 1-iron by 11 months.

'This is one tough golf hole!'

Golfers -"I couldn't have gone to work today anyway, my wife is sick."

Common golf Problems: 'Worst slice I have ever seen!'

'I'd do better if I knew all the words you know!'

Jack Nicklaus.

'Probably a nine iron, or in your case, nine iron, nine iron, nine iron. . .'

A man holding a golf club eying up his shot

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

he tries to fly all the time but actually never gets airborne

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'

"This never happened."

Swinging

'Maybe the batteries are dead.'

"Helmet, check. Harness, check. Knee and elbow pads, check. You may now push the swing."

Golfer hanging from tree branch to play difficult shot.

'Lost your ball again?' - 'No, I've got my ball. I've lost my club.'

"Maths is easy because it's so logical. 2 + 2 obviously equals 22."

'Not that slowly back...'

And if the ball is completely unplayable...

'Do you have any golf balls that are not attracted to water, sand or trees?'

'I'm sure I could lie on my back waving my feet in the air if I could play the saxophone.'

"Ok, so I go back and forth… Then what?"

Office Park

Swing

"Recess is over, Your Honor."

Mother pushes twins on a double-decker swing.

"Maybe you need some kind of app to make it work."

'Where's my horse?'

A boy and his spin patrol.