Suv Defender Gifts

'If you're not over-protective of your new SUV, then why on earth would you bring it way out here on our hunting trip?'

Touring Cyclist

"I think globally, but I tend to pollute locally."

'It seats two comfortably.'

"Frankly, I never would've figured you for an S.U.V. person."

"Squeeze a monkey! They've only gone and taken all the blanket again!"

'I think your son is being bullied. He's suffering 80% Chinese wrist burns.'

'Having him declawed was a total was a total waste of money.'

"If you want to buy this, I'm afraid I'm going to need to see some justification."

I defend to the death your right to say things I agree with.

'I still say it would be faster if we had a four-wheel drive.'

'Don't let any SUV's pass us.'

4 x 4s - buy one, get one free.

'But on the plus side, I felt better about owning an SUV as soon as I bought some oil stocks.'

'This is my toughest soldier -- He's been through Mom's vacuum cleaner eight times!'

"We breed them for aggressiveness."

'Uh oh, they all have 6,000 pound cars now.'

COVID-19 in the Big Apple.

Emerging from Bankruptcy.

Expensive fuel costs make driving large vehicles costly.

Hire car is overtaken and dominated by 4x4 'Higher car'.

"Believe me, with the Equalizer, here, you'll never take any crap from an S.U.V. again."

'I'm looking for something that says 'luxury'... but most of all... 'get out of the way!''

Size Matters.

"What would it take to get you behind the reins of this family suv?"

'Unsinkable.'

'You're a selfish, egotistical, eco-vandal, oil-sucking son-of-a-bitch!'

Vulture oil inc.

Maybe I should get a convertible.

"This S.U.V. sports a flame-retardant, electro-static coating. Eco-activists can't burn it and their pamphlets and bumper stickers slide right off!"

Please help 4x4 to fill.