Survivor Of The Daily Grind Pillows

"So how was your commute?"

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

Emergency Phone.

"How was my day? I'm still calculating the little victories minus the humiliations I normally suffer."

Commutobile

Work Slave

'Would you like a push Dear?'

'No Jake, I don't want to watch you do it again.'

"No, I'm not building a raft. I'm building a double bed!"

"We're a bit understaffed today, could you be 6 people?"

"What next?" "Don't tell me."

'I wanted shorter hours, so he cut my breaks.'

'My therapist defines insanity as doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.'

Everything opens up as a new day begins.

'Any chance of getting your alarm clock fixed?

A usual day.

How to survive the coming crash.

'Hello dear - I've had a very depressing day.'

'Kate was running late for work and to make matters worse she put a ladder in her stockings'

"Scotch and water, *hic* scotch and water..."

"Don't get caught."

'That's great, Bob, but I was just going to ask if you wanted anything from the deli next door.'

"Listen, girl: It's been three days, we're lost and out of food. I need you to find a radio that has the Bruins game on ..."

"Miss Caldwell, write twenty letters, make five Xerox copies of each, feed the whole lot into the shredder, and then, if it's five o'clock, you may go home."

The Twelve Labors of Hercules of Elmhurst

Commuter reads book entitled: Commuters for Dummies.

'Check... weapons... maps... house-wife... clean underwear...'

"At least you have a tree."

"I usually wake up screaming at six-thirty, and I'm in my office by nine."

A marooned man builds a swing set from his lone palm tree.

Please continue to hold, but feel free to switch hands.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz - 'How did my life get this dull?'

"...He's been going to work in a wheelie bin. He says its quicker, cleaner and less cramped"

"If you really want to stay on here, Wiles, you're going to have to give more effort."

'I'm sorry, but I don't know where 'this is'. I, too, am a stranger here.'