Survivalists With A Laugh Gifts

"At least we've got plenty of food."

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

"Wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . . wa-wa. . ."

'If we hadn't outsourced the staff, we could've eaten them.'

"That's 'Help' with an 'H'."

"If you got us lost ... I am so eating you first."

'Bottled water or other non-carbonated diet beverage!'

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

'You are here' sign on desert island.

'I'm kind of a survivalist myself. I roast my own coffee and distil my own gin.'

"I'm next time I spring for the personal Wi-Fi hotspot..."

"Sure he's cute, but we should have discussed this."

"This better be high tide."

"Don't even bother – this oasis only has two and a half stars."

Town follows the snow plough.

'You go ahead. I just don't feel like drinking this afternoon ...'

"The problem is, you never know if they're ripe until you bite into one."

'Are you going anywhere near a chemist?'

'Oh wait, I've got a good one! I spy with my little eye.'

'Hey, I know! -- We can dig a basement and wait till it floods!'

Republican Beach. . . Nature Preserve rule: EAT OR BE EATEN!

"I'm increasing your OnlyFan subscription..."

'I'm sorry I don't date people from other islands!'

'I bet it's nice and warm inside!'

Stay in school.

"Will you quit listening to your ten all-time favorite albums and help me find some food!"

Look! A penny!

Woman on desert island reads message she finds in a bottle: 'It's an ad for a diet club.'

Koool sunglasses, only $10-.

"Karl, act like a stuffed porcupine!"

NO FACILITIES

'What'