Surprise Chef T-Shirts

'Tomato Surprise. Bean Surprise. Carrot Surprise. Why are you always so surprised when my garden produces?'

Devil in the Oven

Halloween may be a little different this year.

"Maybe if we added some pumpkin spice?"

Barbeque Casualty.

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

Better Not Squash.

Witch's Brew.

Quartet of chefs.

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

Cook in the cookery section.

I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.

'Cook is a musician. Improvises. Never makes the same thing twice.'

Sushi Train Set.

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

"We didn't have any whipped cream, so I used foaming hand soap."

"The tiny red things were harvested from Frankie's bonsai tree."

'That's funny... I could have sworn I saw the chef put him on the platter.'

"Don't hold back on the toad legs now - I'm through with Nouvelle Cuisine!"

'..and one for the pot.'

Never use a cookbook written by a mystery book author. You never know how things will turn out!

'It's her signature dish.'

'Nothing like the workplace to inspire creativity.'

"Do you like eye of newt in your Mac 'n' Cheese?"

'Home-made pie will be quick, I only live 10 minutes from here.'

"Try and push the eye of newt and wing of bat casserole."

'I don't know what we were thinking, baking inside a tree...'

Witches in kitchen, sign for man says 'Your dinner's in the coven'.

'Carrot cake!.. What's next?.. Broccoli cake?'

"Pulled chicken? You don't want to know."

'Chefs, the secret ingredient for tonight's competition is - wing of bat!'

'It might be a satanic cult: Not only did they chop his head off, they're stuffing his body with bread now...'

Football Pudding

'How much gin will I need for three medium size lemons?'

'These are exquisite! You simply must give me your recipe.'