Surprise Chef T-Shirts

'Tomato Surprise. Bean Surprise. Carrot Surprise. Why are you always so surprised when my garden produces?'

Devil in the Oven

"Maybe if we added some pumpkin spice?"

Halloween may be a little different this year.

Barbeque Casualty.

Recipes from The Lying Gourmet

Witch's Brew.

Better Not Squash.

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

Quartet of chefs.

Cook in the cookery section.

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

'Cook is a musician. Improvises. Never makes the same thing twice.'

Sushi Train Set.

I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.

"We didn't have any whipped cream, so I used foaming hand soap."

"The tiny red things were harvested from Frankie's bonsai tree."

'..and one for the pot.'

'That's funny... I could have sworn I saw the chef put him on the platter.'

Never use a cookbook written by a mystery book author. You never know how things will turn out!

"Don't hold back on the toad legs now - I'm through with Nouvelle Cuisine!"

'Nothing like the workplace to inspire creativity.'

'It's her signature dish.'

'Home-made pie will be quick, I only live 10 minutes from here.'

"Try and push the eye of newt and wing of bat casserole."

"Do you like eye of newt in your Mac 'n' Cheese?"

'I don't know what we were thinking, baking inside a tree...'

Witches in kitchen, sign for man says 'Your dinner's in the coven'.

'Chefs, the secret ingredient for tonight's competition is - wing of bat!'

'Carrot cake!.. What's next?.. Broccoli cake?'

'It might be a satanic cult: Not only did they chop his head off, they're stuffing his body with bread now...'

Football Pudding

"Pulled chicken? You don't want to know."

'How much gin will I need for three medium size lemons?'

'These are exquisite! You simply must give me your recipe.'