Supermarket Employees Gifts

Bicycle race.

"Good For You / Bad For You"

But is it organic?

Thank you, Essential Workers

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

Instant Laundry Detergent, 'Just add water'.

'Kix? Yes, Ma'am -- you can get your Kix on aisle 66.'

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

'Tesco's cheif executive meets with staff.'

Only One Item or Fewer.

'We have a P-O-P display for our new perfume. Can we move the beef jerky down a smidge?'

Price may vary with weather.

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

"Hey, Al! What do you know about shelf life?"

Don't have a hot flush....

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

Lemon Harangue Pie Mix

Low Hanging Fruit

'A word of advice, the squeaky wheel gets the totally organic, 0 trans-fat, soy-based lubricant.'

Attack of the 'health' foods

'I've drawn up a health and safety policy for the company.'

'Frank, leak to the tabloids that these slow moving broccoli flakes cure cancer.'

Food samples in supermarket - 'There's a stick in mine.'

Biker chopper shopper

'I just couldn't think of the word poultry.'

"...and most of all, thank you for pre-cooked holiday meals from the supermarket!"

"Sir, surely it's irresponsible to be throwing away so much edible food?"

"This is Piggly Wiggly, what'd you expect?"

"Sugar, trans fats, and an adorable dead baby lamb. Cash back?"

'It's just a casual job for the summer.'

"Sorry, Martin, but because you're the weakest link in our food chain here, you're fired."