Supermarket Clerk Gifts

'Bag? Any vouchers? Like a packer? If you have two of those... What type of apples are these?'

'Service with a smile.'

"Do you have large print alphabet soup?"

'This coupon has expired, sir, and so have you.'

'Excuse me. . . we don't know what we need to buy here today.'

'Margie, that rude guy who's always on his cell phone is coming through my line again!'

"Good For You / Bad For You"

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"It's kohlrabi, the next hot vegetable."

But is it organic?

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

"We're odd looking but just as good."

Instant Laundry Detergent, 'Just add water'.

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

"So, do you want balls that only go up, or ones that only go down?"

'Kix? Yes, Ma'am -- you can get your Kix on aisle 66.'

'Sorry sir,but we can't just take your word that the boots leak'

"Pillows for sleeping on are downstairs. These are all for screaming into."

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

"I hate it when they put kittens in the impulse buying section."

"Where can I find the lefts?"

Only One Item or Fewer.

"Not much in the way of loot, but we got a ton of store credit."

Price may vary with weather.

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

'No, I'm afraid we don't have calendars in dog-years.'

'Frank, leak to the tabloids that these slow moving broccoli flakes cure cancer.'

"Your receipt is also available in a choice of colors."

'VEGETARIAN ZOMBIES' BW

Low Hanging Fruit

'We couldn't give away black-and-white TVs until we started advertising them as having 'non multi-color capability'.'

Attack of the 'health' foods

A Lady Out Shopping.

Alphabet soup