Superhero Skeptic Gifts

Life on Earth - Why bother?

"Boss, if you could be any superhero, which one would it be?" "Insurance-Adjuster-Man." "In a world where superheroes were real, there'd be an awful lot of collateral damage to buildings and infrastructure." "Insurance-Adjuster-Man would probably clear six figures by breakfast." "'Heroes' aren't in it for the money." "Of course they are. Take Lex Luthor, for instance..."

"The new Matter-Eater Lad movie is going to be better than the new Avengers movie because it's not about saving the whole world." "Yeah. People are tired of blockbusters where the fate of the whole world is at stake. That's why 'The Martian' did so well." "It was only about the fate of Matt Damon and his potato garden." "I want to see a movie where aliens try to conquer Venus and nobody cares." "We really should have our own movie review show."

"Let's go to my sister's house. They have the 'Absolutely No Super Hero Movies Channel.'"

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

Alternative Medicine

Cow of BEEF

'A 'D' in physics and biology, an 'A' in reading aloud. What will ever become of this kid?'

"If we evolved from stupid people, why are there stupid people still around?"

"Wait, you never wash your cape?"

First clue that the latest medical breakthrough isn't quite there yet - 'Don't worry, I had the same thing...'

'I was born with math immunity, so I'm special. I know that.'

In a career limiting move, Reginald decided to give Albert's latest theory some frank and fearless feedback.

"What I like about intelligent design is that it explains everything will proving nothing."

"If they de-regulate this place, we wouldn't have to do all those boring scientific tests."

"I totally meant to do that."

"Solar flares may be a contributing factor or perhaps it's a negative vibe sensitivity...."

'It's just a conspiracy by scientists to get funding.'

"Recent studies now show that people who use the aphorism ‘whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’ have compromised immune systems."

Science deniers Soc.

GOP presidental candidates on science!: 'Billions for astrollogers! Zero for astronomers!' s

"Dad just told me a weird stork story. He must be a creationist."

"Huh! Never a miracle vaccine when you want one - then three come along at the same time - bloody typical!"

Documentation Please

"The drug has, however, proved more effective than traditional psychoanalysis."

Rational explanations

RFK Jr Anti-Vax

Institute of the Paranormal: Research Division and Crackpot Division.

"I take it the tortoise wasn't available."

"I'm a rebel! I refuse the tyranny of evolution!"