Summertime Storyteller Gifts

The Month of June

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

Late night teddy reading

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

'Please make us instruments of Thy peace, starting with Bucky Sims.'

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

Support Group for a Good Problem

Shadow Puppet Bunny Threatened By Shadow Hawk

'She's just great with the children.'

A vampire in a canoe.

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

Kid to fellow fisherman: 'Why do they stink like fish when they've been bathing this whole time?'

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

'Read me the one about the ant and the obsessive-compulsive grasshopper.'

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

"Off my back and out of the sack. Let's unpack and have a snack!"

Now Simon would have nightmares about his mother's failing eyesight.

"So, when he says, 'What a good boy am I,' Jack is really reinforcing his self-esteem."

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

Ant story: 'and so they worked all day and they worked all night and then they worked some more, the end.'

“Hey Everyone! It’s the first day of Fall! Okay, you go first!”

"And if that diamond ring don’t shine, Poppa will probably take it back to 47th Street and get something for your mother."

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

Camping.

'Who I played in Summer Stock.'

"Oh,oh - here comes quality time again."

"I'm actually pretty ready for bed."

"... and the sales call was coming from inside the house!"

"Customers who bought 'The Three Little Pigs' also bought...."