Summer Vacation Reader Gifts

"I'm sorry, sir, but Dostoyevsky is not considered summer reading. I'll have to ask you to come with me."

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

Woman uses a remote control to turn on the sunset.

'He lives for his holidays.'

Grand Canyon. What's so great about the Grand Canyon?...Most of it's missing!

Bring your own inflatable.

What say we rough it today and go without ice in our drinks!

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

Gone With the Wind: The Beach Blanket

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

Build a Raft

"Tia Carmen, is it okay if my study group meets here tomorrow?"

Wood Stain and Sun Tan Lotion

Marshmallows

"The tide is coming in, sweetheart!"

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

'Are we there yet?'

"Now you've seen the bust how about letting me see Naples?"

"Did you check the SPF, dear?"

What's that? - 'It's a mosquito bite.' - 'Scratch it!' - 'No, I need to buy some cream.' - 'Make it bleed!!!' - 'Gahhh!!!' -

Young Picasso at the Beach

"Excuse me, but for some reason you have us traveling with our kids."

"Eventually, you'll learn to hate your body, then love it again, then hate it—and back and forth until the beach becomes very complicated."

Try me/try me/try me...

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

'Gerry just can't seem to relax on holiday.'

Ice Cream And Summer Rentals

'How very Cumbria.'

"Be sure to check out the rides. They're free, too, with the purchase of tickets."

"Lets find another beach, this one has too much competition."

" 'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' a treatment by Todd Mozelle, Grade Three."

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"In the current market, it's just more practical."

'Nope. I didn't see any dogfish.'

"I’ve got to take this. It’s someone who isn’t obsessed with summer fun."