Subpoena Sympathizer Pillows

'What do you have for the recently subpoenaed?'

"Wait, you never wash your cape?"

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

I've been feeling sluggish lately.

"Remember, junior, in America anyone can aspire to become the most powerful person in government - the special prosecutor!"

"I suppose you're worried about your little peasant benefits."

"Let me take that for you."

'Here's my report card and here's my personal disclaimer.'

'I wanted to hear the pita pata of tiny feet so he bought me a hamster.'

"They think it's easy being the bleedin' bluebird of happiness!"

"Who the hell keeps doing that?"

The Downside Of Being Superman, The Man Of Steel

'If you can hear me, Larry Gligstein, please send a text to 555-703-7193

The minister's a sub, so we're all going to sing the wrong hymn, pass it on …

'Good old fashioned turkey shoot.'

'Flamin' tourists...'

Snail to Slug.

"If you look carefully through this beaker of oil everything looks so much better..."

and WHAT is this thing stuck in my back garden..?

Neighbourhood watch and slug watch.

Scary Slug Stories

"Bloody satellites..!"

"I taught him to shake hands, and now he's running for congress!"

Mayakovskiy V.V.

"It's father, doctor, he's creaking badly."

Man to complaints clerk: 'My dog just died and I think my wife's cheating on me.'

'I'm happy to say that both parties agree on the issue. It's got bi-partisan non-support.'

"The only planet within a radius of 8975 light years . . . you're simply unable to back into a parking space!"

Now, this is a good garden: full of weeds! The likelyhood of somebody trying to poison us here is very low...

Close encounter.

Sorry to hear about your accident.

"Brian says in 1976 we just got on with it."

Innocent Civilians

He's a rebel without a cause.

'Occupy' camp at St Paul's cathedral, London.