Style Mischief Maker Pillows

'Hello, Mom. Remember dressing me on my first day of school? Could you run me through that again?'

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

Newt sale

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

'Outside with that!'

'Guess what I'd like to see disappear next.'

Teacher to student: 'Nice use of glitter, but you were assigned to do math problems.'

'I couldn't practice last night on account of my Dad's head was gonna' explode.'

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

Artist gets pooped on by lots of birds.

Occupational Hazards.

'In the middle of the second movement, Rodney's worst fears were realized; Phillippe began to sing along.'

'You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off. . .!'

"...And I cheated at solitaire...twice."

Timpani for the devil

"I'm in the national team...not because I'm a good player, but because everybody panics when I start singing the anthem!"

'He wanted to be remembered this way.'

Man defaces a painting to make it fit above his fireplace.

Mozart swimming.

'I'd like an older brother, please.'

'Why are you hiding in the closet?'

"What do you recommend for yellow teeth?"

Frankie the discount genie

"No, no, no! My old 45 records do not belong in the craft box!"

"Just think, in dog years we'd be old enough to know better!"

'Talk about fun, Joey! I dialed a zillion numbers and talked to all kinds of people I couldn't even understand!'

The concert that never was. . .

"And the important thing is to make sure you wake them up EVERY HOUR during the night."

Aircraft accidentally hits a witch.

"You mihgt have fallen our with Uncle Hamish, but he likes me. He's given me his bag pipes."