Student Loan Skeptic Gifts

"It's all a scam! If we get a job after college, we'll have to pay off a big student loan debt and pay taxes."

Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000... Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000...

"I'm taking 'moving back in with the parents' studies."

"I'm worried. We're small enough to fail, but not big enough to be bailed out!"

'So far more education hasn't helped me get a job. I think I'll get some student loans and get some more education.'

Student Debt

'This charge is for the office visit, this charge is for blood work, and this charge just about pays off the doc's school loan.'

The private sector is a parasite on the economy.

'Trevor, it's some gentlemen to see you about your student loan.'

Life plan

Gone for Broke College

The sixth college sense. 'I see debt people.'

"If you had $1,000, and I asked you for a loan of $23.47, what percent of your original money would you left?"

"How much would it cost if I don't take classes but just live in a dorm with a meal plan?"

"It's a rags to riches story. He started with $80,000 in student loan debt, and now he has a job and moved out of his parent's basement."

'The latest on the tuition front. Next year nobody will be able to afford college.'

Graduate Job Openings

After years of study & hard effort, you're ready to begin your life's work. . . paying off your student loan."

'Oh he's my loans officer.'

'Sorry kids, we've had to introduce parenting fees.'

'Maybe so, sir, but our motto is, 'A penny saved is a lot of trouble for nothing.''

'Do you have poor credit? . . . Visit paydayloanshark.com for instant cash!'

"Oh, they sent me to the best obedience school...now I have to dig my bones to pay the loans."

"Just think, your student loan may outlive you."

'Student debt??? You ought to see my campaign debt!'

"We spent a lot of money educating him so..."

'We're sending you back so that you can pay off your student loans.'

'I hope your company does not have mandatory retirement at 65. I'll have to work until 95 to pay off my student loans.'

Son, when I went to school, I trudged for years knee-deep in student loans!

"$120,000 in student loan debt, and you're telling me I need to dumb down my resume?"

"It's time once again for Jesus to chase the money changers from the temple."

"...Yes, of course you have to pay it back. That's why it's called a student LOAN!"

"I figure that by the time I’m 62, I’ll have no student-loan debt, then, who knows – maybe start a family."

'I hereby sentence you to 40 years labor in an office with florescent lighting, just enough salary to keep you alive to the next paycheck, and a student loan that you never quite pay off.'