Student Loan Conqueror Gifts

After years of study & hard effort, you're ready to begin your life's work. . . paying off your student loan."

Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000... Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000...

"Statins. I got statins. Who needs statins?"

'Good news! Throwing yourself at the mercy of the cholesterol seems to have worked.'

"I'm taking 'moving back in with the parents' studies."

'So far more education hasn't helped me get a job. I think I'll get some student loans and get some more education.'

Cocoa. Make it a double. Sure, Myles. Coming up. Here ya go. Double today; everything okay? Oh yeah, sure. What's not okay about realizing 3rd grade means a whole bunch of homework and Sally Anne Peters wanting to talk about feelings? Tell me all this weirdness ends soon. Triple on the house.

Student Debt

Minister Starts at a New Church

'There are two types of cholesterol - the good type, then the one you've got.'

'This charge is for the office visit, this charge is for blood work, and this charge just about pays off the doc's school loan.'

"Graduates, faculty, parents, creditors..."

'Trevor, it's some gentlemen to see you about your student loan.'

Life plan

'Considering my student debt, I felt it prudent to specialize in bankruptcy law,'

In the red

The sixth college sense. 'I see debt people.'

'Maybe framed copies of your mortgage, auto loan, and tuition loans are too much of a motivator. Maybe you need a financial planner.'

As he picked up the video game controller, the trap was sprung, and Ryan's mother forced him to fill out college applications.

"It's a rags to riches story. He started with $80,000 in student loan debt, and now he has a job and moved out of his parent's basement."

"How much would it cost if I don't take classes but just live in a dorm with a meal plan?"

Big City Bank Loan manager

The Conquest

"Just think, your student loan may outlive you."

"Oh, they sent me to the best obedience school...now I have to dig my bones to pay the loans."

'Student debt??? You ought to see my campaign debt!'

"We spent a lot of money educating him so..."

Son, when I went to school, I trudged for years knee-deep in student loans!

'I'm concerned about your cholesterol level.'

'We're sending you back so that you can pay off your student loans.'

'I hope your company does not have mandatory retirement at 65. I'll have to work until 95 to pay off my student loans.'

A man gets attacked by his credit report.

'I hereby sentence you to 40 years labor in an office with florescent lighting, just enough salary to keep you alive to the next paycheck, and a student loan that you never quite pay off.'

"What do you get indeed sir. Another day older and deeper in debt is what you get."

The Bachelord