Structure Skeptic Gifts

"It won the award this year for aggravating the most architects."

'The wheel was easy, the owner's manual is hard!'

'Seriously, in this day and age, how can people still believe in this nonsense that we have evolved from microbes...?'

The Department of Mystery - No one really knows who we are or what we do, including us.

"It looks like a perfectly balanced system to me."

Alternative Medicine

"Well, son. . . here your dad makes the famous 'fresh from nature' food!"

'A 'D' in physics and biology, an 'A' in reading aloud. What will ever become of this kid?'

"If we evolved from stupid people, why are there stupid people still around?"

"I'm in my third day of trying to figure out which little square I am."

'Einstein's theory of negativity'

"Sure, it's 'beautiful,' Ray, but where are the outlet stores?!"

"I think I might go outside. My fresh air app is glitchy today."

Can't you anarchists do anything within the system?

First clue that the latest medical breakthrough isn't quite there yet - 'Don't worry, I had the same thing...'

'...Contains Phixe-knide, TBHQ, hydro-cla, Cyklid, Yetfopnmide - and other unpronounceable stuff.' (grocery store)

Organic foods stand manned by stallholder using fly spray.

'I was born with math immunity, so I'm special. I know that.'

In a career limiting move, Reginald decided to give Albert's latest theory some frank and fearless feedback.

"If they de-regulate this place, we wouldn't have to do all those boring scientific tests."

"I gained 10 pounds? I've brought my own bathroom scale for a second opinion."

Two plus two equals five. I don't think so. The earth is flat, or maybe it's shaped like a fish. Huh? Many Republican candidates don't believe in evolution!!! Math, science -- who needs 'em really. That's what I said in high school.

"What I like about intelligent design is that it explains everything will proving nothing."

Weight Gain Denial

'No, it's not water. You seem to be retaining food.'

"The new system is 100% accurate as long as the client is called Colin and lives in Swindon."

"I totally meant to do that."

"Solar flares may be a contributing factor or perhaps it's a negative vibe sensitivity...."

"Huh! Never a miracle vaccine when you want one - then three come along at the same time - bloody typical!"

Science deniers Soc.

Today's Topic: "Intelligent Design." Do you believe in "intelligent design"? I did until I met you.

"Actually, I'm tired of the man trying to shape our minds so they fit into some pre-arranged societal widget."

Freedom Puppet

Doing Something About the Weather

"Recent studies now show that people who use the aphorism ‘whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’ have compromised immune systems."